my two-inch butt

I had the yardstick out because I was measuring the stairs to figure out exactly how much carpet we would need for them. As I was staring at the stairs, thinking about ideas, Emmersyn grabbed the yardstick and started measuring me.

She started with my leg: "Your leg has twoooo inches."

Then my butt: "Your butt has twoooo inches."

Sweet!

knock knock

I was concentrating on something I was doing on the computer, and Emmersyn kept jabbering. I wasn't responding, so she knocked on my arm and said, "Knock knock. Who's there?"

That got my attention.

relationship

Emmersyn has recently become obsessed with people's relationships to one another. She's always saying things like, "You are my mom, and I am your daughter, and Pierce is my brother..." et cetera et cetera.

Yesterday she said this: "I am yuh daw-ta, and you aw my mom, and gwumma is yuh mom, and gwumma is my gwumma, and gwumpa is my gwumpa, and gwumma ida* is my gwumma ida."

And I laughed.

*Grandma Ida is my mom's mom, and since our kids are blessed with sooo many great-grandparents, we tried to simplify it by calling them "Grandma Ida", "Grandpa Mo", etc.

Not My Child! Monday Tuesday

I found a old blog post draft from at least three months ago. I was saving it for the next time that MckMama did a Not My Child! Monday, but apparently I forgot about it. So here it is...


I have completely trained my children how to have good manners and eat neatly. So there's no way that my 3-1/2 year old daughter looked like this after eating baked beans for lunch one day.

I was in the middle of feeding Aniston when I discovered Miss Beany Face, so I put down Aniston's jar of peaches or whatever they were and went to tend to Emmy's mess. I was not reminded that baked beans are next to impossible to clean up without a chisel. And before I even got a chance to wipe Emmy up, I did not discover that Aniston had done this. I did not leave the jar of baby food within Aniston's reach so that she could grab it and proceed to pour them down her belly.
I did not start laughing hysterically because it was just one of those moments where you either laugh or cry.

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I am a mom who is ever-vigilant about making sure that there is nothing on the floor that shouldn't be in the hands of a baby. Which is why Aniston did not get hold of a (non-toxic kids') marker and proceed to eat the end off.

She did not do this when I took away the marker.

And she did not have black stools that stained her butt for the next couple of days. Nope! Not my child!

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Xander is 5 years old and knows where it is and is not appropriate to go pee. Which is why, when Chris and I took the kids to the park one Sunday, we did not discover Xander urinating in the sand in the play area. Not my child! (And we did not realize what he was doing only because we saw another dad do a double take at Xander.)

our bugs

As I mentioned in my last post titled Die-na-ree-na, Emmersyn has a little stomach bug going on.  This morning I was sitting at the table with my Bible and coffee, and Emmersyn came down the stairs announcing that she had puked in her bed.

Sure enough, she had puked in her bed sometime in the middle of the night. And instead of coming downstairs for help, she flipped her pukey pillow over, covered the pukey part of her sheets with a clean blanket, and went back to sleep. Covered in puke, cuddling with a puppy covered in puke.

Delish.

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Speaking of sickness. Xander is now in his third day of antibiotics and is doing much better. He is finally getting his appetite back!  He had me a bit worried, to be honest.